Set a small, finishable goal
The dread comes from an impossible assignment, which is to work the room. Replace it with a possible one: three real conversations and one follow-up worth sending. When you have them, you are free to go.
Arrive in the first fifteen minutes. An early room holds a dozen people standing singly or in pairs, all of them glad to be approached. The same room an hour later is a wall of closed circles with a noise problem.
Where to stand and whom to approach
The line for food or drinks is the easiest place at any event, because everyone in it is facing the same direction with nothing to do. Approach people who are standing alone, who are nearly always relieved, and groups of three or more standing in a loose horseshoe with a gap. Leave two people facing each other squarely alone.
Have your line ready
You will be asked what you do twenty times, so prepare an answer that is one sentence long and gives the listener something to ask about. "I'm in logistics" closes the subject. "I work out how to get refrigerated medicine to rural pharmacies before it spoils" opens it. If you are between jobs or changing fields, say what you are moving toward: "I've spent five years in teaching, and I'm looking to move into training design."
Then turn to them. Ask what they are working on at the moment, or how they came to the field, and listen for anything you can help with. Offering before asking is the entire secret of people who are good at this.
Leaving a conversation
Five to ten minutes is the right length. These exits all work.
- Say, "I promised myself I'd meet a few new people tonight, so I'm going to keep moving, and it was a pleasure."
- Say, "I'd like to continue this, so let me get your contact details before I lose you."
- Introduce them to someone nearby, give each a fact about the other, and step away.
The follow-up
Note on the back of their card, or in your phone, what you talked about and what you promised. Within two days, send a short message that mentions the specific conversation and delivers the promised item. A contact with no follow-up is a stranger whose card you own.
Tip Go with a colleague if it helps you through the door, but agree to split up for the first half hour. Two people who arrive together and stay together meet nobody.
